Angry Brown Woman

When my second daughter was learning about her colors she asked me why did people say she was black.  She is a very logical child.  She said, "I am not black.  I am brown."  I like that so I decided to refer to myself as brown. 

A few days ago I was angry.  I was angry at people who never called to see how I was doing.  I was angry that the twenty jobs I applied to that was close to home never called.  I was angry at everything and anyone.  I was just angry. 

I realized that I had to stop being angry.  I checked on everyone when I called them for help.  I was angry that  I realized I never called just to see how people were doing.  Therefore, I cannot complain about no one calling me. Talk about do unto others. 

Now I do not call anyone because I do not lie to people anymore.  When I call and ask "How are you?"  Their immediate response is "Fine. How are you?"  When people ask me I do not say fine anymore because I am not fine. 

I am angry.

I do not want to say, "Oh, I was not feeling well a couple of days ago.  I went downstairs in the middle of the night.  I was trying to hurry because the baby was crying.  I was reaching for the milk and my feet got away from me.  I fell on my back and hit my head."  No one wants to sit and listen to that story.  You do not want to even want to read that story. 

Now I know what you are thinking.  My MS.  It might have been my MS.  But since I have always been a natural klutz there is no telling.  It is a mystery even to me.  I am leaning toward my cat-like agility.  :)
 
I guess I could say, "I could be better."

Anyway, I decided to change myself and not try to change others.  If I truly care about what happens to a person or I want to catch up, then I will go to Facebook.  That is where everyone hangs out now. 

Many people would say that I am antisocial.  I really am not. I am on Facebook.  The most social social network.  

Or am I antisocial?  Who knows.  All I know is that I open myself to others and they take advantage. 

I have to be more careful because I will be used up if I keep giving to others.  I already have to give to my kids.  I do not want to have nothing left for my husband or myself. 

Angry Brown Woman Out.  Wait that is a good name for a blog.