I Do Not Have Anything (Hope)

Today I am going to sleep over at my parent's house.  My mother will be taking me to my MRI tomorrow to see how well I am doing on this new medication.  I am nervous about it.  I try to put up a brave front.  I am hoping that they do not find MS.  That it was a misdiagnosis.  That I am just a clumsy woman who can not cook.  A woman that hates housework because she has been doing housework all her life.

Housework was fun when you were younger and you knew that it was not all your responsibility.  I just wanted some help.  Instead I get treated like a twelve year old.  I do not treat any of my kids like they are younger or older than they are.  Well I guess I had something to write.  Well it is time to put my big girl panties on.  I hope the MRI comes out clear.

Liar Liar Pants on Fire Walk Before I Run

I do not like to lie. To be a good liar you have to become the lie.  With MS you never know how that will manifest.  For me it has manifested in the inability to walk right.  I also have to concentrate on where I am going in order to get to my destination.  I lie to myself that it will not get any worse. But I am stubborn and I have three kids to take care of.  They say that they do not need me and they have it covered.  After hearing all the arguing about who does what.  I have a feeling my job is not done. 

Enough is enough

Today I walked without the aid of my cane.  I do not know if that is good or bad.  I hope it is good I do not know if I have totally  healed from my fall.  I do know my leg was burning from lack of use.  I had to push fear aside  and trust G would help me walk on my two feet.  Enough bad.  It is time for good.  Well there is good.  My kids, my husband. 

Enough

When do you have enough.  Enough of anything.  I have learned that some people can never have enough of anything.  There is never enough money.  There is never enough of anything.  For my kids there is never enough food or candy.  For the little people in my life they want it now and they want a lot of it. 

For my kids their weakness is anything covered in chocolate.

I have the same weakness.

Yesterday I went to a meeting for Avon.  I came out of the meeting with so many ideas of how to make my sales expand.  I got really hopeful about the future.  It is like MS if you can see yourself accomplishing it then you can do it.