Depression

Today I felt tired and sad.

I talk about lies but I feel like the biggest liar there is.  I try to act well for my parents, friends, and brother.  I know a lot of my tiredness is my age and lack of excercise.  I am not 20.  I just wish I was 20 again.  My MS did not make me unfit.  I did that because I am lazy.  Keeping up with a soon to be one year old and an active 7 year old is tiresome.  MS is not to blame for the way I feel today.

I am depressed because I am getting older.  Sometimes life moves quickly.  Sometimes it moves a snails pace. 

I lie to survive.  If I did not lie then the people I do not like would always be around to give me their brand of help.  I feel like a hypocrite.  I wish I could be honest but that would mean putting unwanted stress on myself. 

I write this blog in order to tell the truth.  Well the truth as I see it anyway.  I am not depressed anymore.  Thanks for listening.